I have officially been accepted to UT Galveston! Yay for getting in SOMEWHERE! I probably won't have to live in Lubbock!

As I become increasingly emotionally disconnected from my personal life, I've noticed more and more of my decisions being based purely "on principle". I say that a lot now. I refused "on principle." I got over it "on principle." I'm starting to think that I am literally functioning based on my philosophical disagreements with today's culture. It is now easier for me to make decisions based "on principle" than on my "feelings". This was not intentional, but surely it will aid me in my future medical endeavors.

I'm also becoming much more anti-social, and that is making me very productive creatively. It is also possible that I am being very productive creatively, and that is making me more anti-social. The fact that this is my second livejournal entry in a week is a testament to both those things.

I don't know how I did it, but somehow I figured it all out. By "it", I mean everything. And it's just as awesome as I always hoped it would be. My character has reached its adolescent phase epiphany.

Also, somehow, magically, the shuffle mode on my ipod has discovered how to read my mind. It's incredible how much that can affect one's mood, positively.

I just put my first med school interview on my calendar. It's only for UT Galveston, but that felt really good.

On a side note, anybody know anyone that lives in Galveston that would let me sleep on their couch?

I think there are 2 types of people in this world- those that are happy for a while, then get bored, and get depressed, and then there are those who are depressed about a change, but then adjust, and are happy. I believe, very much so, that I am the latter. I am referring currently to my singledom. Holy crap, I love being single. When I first started loving it, I thought I was lying to myself, that I was in denial. But no. It's just plain awesome. It also leads to important revelations about myself, such as the fact that I am almost exclusively attracted to men with dark hair and thick eyebrows. Actually, it took Aubree to point that out, and I can't find a single exception to the rule, throughout my entire life. Tonight I got drunk, and have been trying to trace this attraction to its earliest manifestation. I happened to turn on my most recent VHS aquisition: New Kids on the Block- Step by Step. Now, I'm beginning to think that my pattern of sexual attraction for the rest of my life lies with Jordan Knight, from New Kids on the Block. He was always my favorite. What I don't know is if he started this trend, or if he's simply the first subject of it, and it's actually pre-programmed, genetically or something, into me. And to you Freudians- I'm looking at Alan if he reads this still- my dad may be dark haired, but he is not thick eye-browed, and both qualities are strictly required, so don't even start on that road.

DAY 1, BACK IN AUSTIN:
This morning I laid in a big field in my bathing suit and read a book while watching dogs run around and fight. Then I met some friends for $2 margaritas and smoked a bowl with a few new people. On the way home, I chatted with 3 crossdressers about the best happy hours in town (Blue Saba for appetizers, El Arroyo for drinks, by the way), and picked a bouquet of wildflowers that now sits cheerfully on my kitchen counter. Right now, I'm inflating my raft to float on the lake and watch the sunset and over 1,000 bats fly over my head while sipping on a 6 pack.

I'm not claiming any ownership over Austin, nor does it claim any ownership over me. I don't think we've fundamentally modified each other in any way, but I do think our interests are conveniently in sync at this point in my life, and I love it. Austin isn't exactly a brother or a sister. It's more like a foreign exchange student that I'm letting live in my house. It's confusing and strange, but accomadating and delightful. Life is so much easier here, and I'm drinking it all in.

EDIT: It poured rain tropical storm style, so instead of rafting Steph and I made tin foil boats and floated them from a spot on a river behind her apt which, I found out AFTERWARDS was where a dead body was found a few weeks ago. Then we made more tin foil boats and floated them from the top of a hill with a stream that was pouring down the middle of a street.

Back from Paris, and back to the real world, which means back to procrastinating. I posted pictures on facebook... if you don't have a facebook account your should probably just get one by now. Myspace is just too messy.

Things Parisians do well: Food, lighting, flowers, and a complete disregard for public decency in matters of alcohol and sex.
Things Parisians could work on: Any kind of bureaucratic process (from buying groceries to reserving a train seat), staring, and their overall smell.

I had a wonderful time. I did not want to leave. I was very well taken care of the entire trip. I had no idea Mark possessed an ounce of romance, but I was very wrong.

But life goes on, and today LITTLE RICHARD is playing a free concert here at UT.

If I don't find a someone to watch the Mavs with by playoffs, I'm craigslisting for one. I'll stand up to that deluge of penis pictures. I just can't scream at the screen by myself any longer.

In other news, I found some amazingly cheap tickets to Paris for spring break to visit Mr. Mark. I have since peed myself slightly with excitement.

I've got to stop freaking out about med school. I've got to remember to breathe. I've got to get in somewhere good. I just wish there was someone who could tell me I'm doing ok, I'm on the right track... and that I could believe them.

The first day of school has been cancelled due to ice. I've already been locked in my apartment for a day. I've already finished my library book and cleaned/compulsively organized everything. What am I going to do to fill all this TIME?

I just returned from my expedition in the Chihuahuan Desert of Big Bend. My muscles are so sore, and my feet so covered in blisters, that I'm skipping half my classes today. I simply can't walk. Since the area we went to is notarious for being deserted (and it was... we didn't see a single shred of evidence that humans have ever been here, other than the rock cairns) I decided to hike topless. Somehow, I lost my shirt entirely, resulting in some very bizarre sunburns and approximately 100000 scratches from cacti. It turns out, when they recommend 1 gallon of water per person per day when you hike in the desert, they mean it. And if you happen to only take half that, your body will slowly eat itself. On the first day, we tried to get down to the Rio Grande, but were stopped by a massive cliff. Instead, we found a pool of water about 2 feet deep, that was still freezing cold because it had rained that morning. Jumping into that after about 9 hours of glaring sun was one of the greatest moments of my life. When we finally set up a tent, and just let the wind flow across our bodies, I was delirious and hallucinating. The full moon rose, and it was the brightest moon I have ever seen. It hurt to look at. I think this is what a spirit quest is like for Indians. Anyway, I posted some pictures on facebook, if anyone cares to look.